Типы рукопожатий и типы характеров

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Типы рукопожатий и типы характеровВластное рукопожатие способствует подчинению. Оно фактически может лишить возможности установить равноправные отношения. Такое рукопожатие свойственно людям, стремящимся руководить, подчинять. Ладонь при этом направляется вниз, в связи с чем партнер просто вынужден повернуть ладонь вверх.

Рекомендуется отвечать на властное рукопожатие так:

— произвести обхват запястья сверху, а затем встряхнуть его. Это позволит на какое-то время выбить из колеи человека, который намерен повелевать.

— пожать руку человека двумя руками. Такое рукопожатие возможно между двумя политиками, т. к. оно символизирует доверие. Этот жест, однако, не стоит применять при знакомстве, потому что у незнакомого человека он может вызвать нежелательное недоверие.

Равнодушное рукопожатие представляет собой слабое касание рук. Такое безжизненное прикосновение оставляет ощущение того, что человек, которому свойственен подобный жест, обладает слабой волей.

Сильным рукопожатием считается то, которое способно вызвать боль. Его обычно предпочитают серьезные люди, основной чертой характера которых является стремление к завоеванию.

Ограничивающее рукопожатие, т. е. пожатие несогнутой в локтевом суставе рукой, способствует сохранению определенного расстояния между людьми, оставляет неприкосновенной личную зону. Такой тип рукопожатия свойственен людям, стремящимся оградить себя от чужого давления, а также людям агрессивным.

Если при ограничивающем рукопожатии в ладонь вкладываются только пальцы, то это говорит о том, что человек не чувствует в себе уверенности.

Тянущее рукопожатие, при котором один из партнеров тянет на себя руку другого, может означать, что этот человек настолько не уверен в себе, что ему просто необходимо находиться только в личной зоне.

Пожатие обеими руками раскрывает весь спектр чувств, дружеский настрой, откровенность. Левую руку кладут на правую руку партнера, при этом насколько выше находится левая рука, настолько сильнее выражаются чувства. Например, рука, лежащая на плече, выражает больше чувств, чем рука, лежащая на запястье.

Но в связи с тем, что такое рукопожатие предполагает вторжение в личную зону, оно может привести к соприкосновению тел. Этот жест возможен только между достаточно близкими людьми, которые в момент приветствия желают выразить всю глубину чувств.

Рукопожатие у народов Кавказа, в частности у адыгов, принято как среди мужчин, так и в общении с женщинами. Первым протягивает руку младший по возрасту. Воздерживаются от рукопожатия только при встрече с малознакомыми и незнакомыми людьми, а также при постоянном общении друг с другом.

У абхазов рукопожатием обмениваются близкие знакомые и родственники. В случае, если при этом присутствуют незнакомые, то пожимают руки и им, а затем последних представляют. У азербайджанцев рукопожатие распространено среди мужчин. Им обмениваются со всеми присутствующими без исключения.

Мы привыкли к тому, что при встрече, если человек сидит, он встает, мужчина пожимает протянутую руку. Но такая форма приветствия существует не у всех народов. Для некоторых данные знаки приветствия представляются странными и неестественными. Известный советский писатель Илья Эренбург рассуждал: «Почему европейцев изумляют нравы Азии?

Европейцы, здороваясь, протягивают руку, и китаец, японец или индиец вынуждены пожать конечность чужого человека. Если бы приезжий совал парижанам или москвичам босую ногу, вряд ли это вызвало бы восторг».

Выдающийся русский ученый и путешественник Миклухо-Маклай писал о приветствиях у папуасов: «Папуасы подают друг другу руки, но не пожимают их. Перед почетным гостем в знак приветствия они приседают на корточки».

Среди мусульман Средней Азии существуют детально разработанные еще в ХIX-начале XX века правила приветствий. В соответствии с ними высокопоставленные лица первыми приветствуют низших; идущий — сидящего; хозяин — слугу.

Первым протягивает руки младший, который приближается к старшему, уже протянув руки и соединив ладони. Приближаясь, подходящий несколько ускоряет шаг, подходит мелкими шажками, как бы желая выразить свою поспешность, нетерпеливое желание пожать руки старшего. Старший ждет рукопожатия на месте. Руки пожимают ладонями, а не концами пальцев.

В Японии не принято здороваться за руку. Вот как описал ритуал приветствия у японцев В. Овчинников в книге «Ветка сакуры»: «Заметив знакомого, японец считает долгом прежде всего замереть на месте, даже если дело происходит на середине улицы и прямо на него, движется трамвай.

Затем он как бы переламывается в пояснице, так что ладони его вытянутых рук скользят вниз по коленям, и, застыв еще на несколько секунд в согбенном положении, осторожно поднимает вверх одни лишь глаза. Выпрямляться первым невежливо, и кланяющимся приходится зорко следить друг за другом».

В мире существует много непривычных для нас форм приветствий. Тибетцы, например, здороваясь, снимают свой головной убор правой рукой. Левую руку они закладывают за ухо да еще высовывают язык. В Индии до сих пор сохранился обычай при встрече знакомых прикладывать ладони к сердцу.

Жители Кении в знак высокого уважения плюют на встречного, а представитель племени масаи при встрече сначала сплевывает, затем плюет на собственную кисть и только после этого позволяет пожать себе руку. Жители Замбези хлопают в ладоши и делают реверанс. Китаец в прежние времена, встречая друга, пожимал руку себе самому. Лапландцы трутся носами.

Латиноамериканцы обнимают друг друга. Французы целуют друг друга в щеку. Самоанцы обнюхивают друг друга. Житель Вены говорит при встрече «целую руку», не задумываясь над смыслом своих слов. Житель Варшавы при встрече с дамой машинально целует ей руку.

Наблюдая за поведением многих людей, Берн заметил, что способность здороваться проявляется в большей степени у тех людей, которые обладают «одной из величайших драгоценностей мира — настоящей естественной улыбкой. Она обычно возникает постепенно, освещая все лицо, и длится не долго, но вполне достаточно, чтобы быть ясно увиденной.

Исчезает она с таинственной медлительностью, как будто бы тает. Сравнить ее можно только с улыбкой любящей матери или радующихся друг другу детей. Такие улыбки бывают чаще всего у людей с открытым добрым характером».

Не надо думать, что улыбка — совершенно естественное проявление человеческих чувств. У разных народов мира улыбаются по-разному. Так, например, у японцев улыбка присутствует на лице независимо от темы разговора. Она прежде всего выражает согласие с собеседником и общую доброжелательность.

Известно также, что у американцев доброжелательной считают только широкую «лучистую» улыбку.

В одном из произведений Сент-Экзюпери написано об улыбке следующее: «Самое важное чаще всего невесомо. Здесь как будто всего важней была улыбка, часто улыбка и есть главное. Улыбкой благодарят, улыбкой вознаграждают. Улыбкой дарят тебе жизнь. И есть улыбка, ради которой пойдешь на смерть. Эта особенная улыбка освобождала от гнетущей тоски наших дней, оделяла уверенностью, надеждой и покоем.»

Таким образом, улыбка — одно из главных выражений доброжелательного отношения, человеческого участия и внимания. Это то, что каждый хочет увидеть на лице своего собеседника.

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